“Good communication is the bridge between confusion and clarity”
Nat Turner 💡
I’ve never been one for sharing personal relationship stories on here – but this one is too good not to share.
I’m still friends with an ex-boyfriend below, probably cos he was a good friend to me and a very genuine guy.
And though our love story wasn’t meant to go beyond what it did, like all relationships, I learnt some valuable pearls o wisdom.
The main one being the value of calm communication. Note – the calm gentle tone was more vital than the words as per studies which show tone and body language account for 65% of communication’s impact, with words being only 35%.
Food for thought, hey?
That was definitely one of his superpowers – a bit like my dad, it was as if in that moment when others might have been angry or agressive (like when I snapped some skis he leant me 🫢), he did what Mr P advises:
“If someone is upset or doesn’t listen, repeat yourself slowly and calmly until they do”.
I’ve never, btw, heard my dad raise his voice once. Ever. No wonder I don’t do well with moody people 🫢
The What Why How handy communication tool below gives structure to the complex business o communication, boosting clarity, closeness and relationship success when you’re struggling to express something. It can also be applied at work 💼
Here’s how the 3 step formula goes:
🔦 What’s important to you
🔦 Why it’s important
🔦 How much of it you need (if relevant)
Continued below ⬇️
You can also ask it in questions if you’re getting to know someone professionally or personally:
For example:
🏈 What are two things that make you feel loved?
🏈 Why is that important to you?
🏈 How often need that?
How would you feel if someone asked you that?
How would it benefit you both?
Another example might be:
🍊 Being open about your worries is important to me
🍊Cos it builds my sense of trust n closeness
🍊 So I’d love it you could try to be open about stuff that’s worrying you when it’s weighing on your mind
What do you think?
What comes up for you if you apply it to pain-points in your life or work?
Simple tools like these can give a how to things that might otherwise block us and transform the complex into the simple.
In fact, often it’s not that we’re not good at communication – it’s a totally learnable skill – we just need the tools and willingness to be slightly vulnerable.
And what do we know about vulnerability?
It’s strength in disguise and it’ll always draw you closer to the right people and organisations 🏹
Try it n see 🪀
☘️ To upgrade your life or career, book a free discovery call: www.melanie-pritchard.com
